Jon Dawson: Dogs are now allowed in grocery stores
A poodle is probably lurking in your local grocery store, just waiting to start a family with a bag of oranges.
A poodle is probably lurking in your local grocery store, just waiting to start a family with a bag of oranges.
“The scratching sound generated by people not picking up their feet confuses the birds and interrupts their migration.”
“These boys showed up thinking ‘adult’ meant they’d be chased around by zombie strippers or something,” Burroughs said on Monday.
Sometimes life gets serious, and this is one of those instances.
“Inside the bag was a sleeping bag, flashlight, a pack of Nabs, French Army knife, a partially eaten pork chop sandwich, and an 8-track copy of Super Freak by Rick James.”
“I’m calling to ask if you’d like to appear on my television show next Tuesday.”
Whenever a hen would stop producing eggs, he’d leave an old golf ball in its nest.
“I need a new ice cream scoop,” she said with a straight face.
Morgan’s career cut short by buffet injury.
Guest columnist Jonathan Massey inches towards fatherhood.