Jon Dawson: A Juicy Fruit Christmas
The Wife’s Christmas stocking might end up being filled with the after-dinner mints that have been in my sports jacket since the last time we went out to dinner during the Carter administration.
Tag: td#1
Bryan Hanks to reunite with former boy band, release Christmas album
“I assume he’s shoring up his alimony reserves.”
Jon Dawson: Dogs are now allowed in grocery stores
A poodle is probably lurking in your local grocery store, just waiting to start a family with a bag of oranges.
Jon Dawson: Stop leaving the house in your pajamas
“The scratching sound generated by people not picking up their feet confuses the birds and interrupts their migration.”
Jon Dawson: Two injured at adult-themed haunted house
“These boys showed up thinking ‘adult’ meant they’d be chased around by zombie strippers or something,” Burroughs said on Monday.
Jon Dawson: An open letter to Lenoir County teachers
Sometimes life gets serious, and this is one of those instances.
Jon Dawson: Vernon Park Mall to become nation’s largest truck stop
“We’re not going to have any Lot Lizards roaming around out here.”
Jon Dawson: Optometrist visit causes wedding cancelation
“I couldn’t figure out why two people who don’t work at night needed so many blackout curtains.”
Jon Dawson: La Grange man subject of new cable reality show
Representatives from the Americana Cable Network asked if I’d be interested in having a show based on my real life.
Jon Dawson: TD#1 graduates high school
Paramedics made their way to the parent behind me who yelled himself into a coma.
